With this year quickly coming to a close, I think that it is an important goal to enter 2020 with not only a clear vision of how you want your life to look, but also an idea of who you want to be a part of it.
I’m sure that I’ve mentioned the concept of Energy Vampires before, and I feel that it is particularly apt to be talking about it again at this time of year! As Christmas and New Year approach, many of us are often required to see people who we may not choose to see outside of any kind of obligatory event. Whether it be a difficult family member, in-law, friend or acquaintance, you may be about to walk into an Energy Vampire extravaganza, so here’s how to spot when that’s about to happen, and how to avoid being having all of your positivity sucked out of you.
First of all: An Energy Vampire is a person who it takes a loooooooot of strength to be around. It is someone who may require an alarming level of validation, needs an audience for their grandiose stories or ridiculous anecdotes, shares unpopular/mean/racist/sexist/homophobic views with anyone and everyone (clearly not realising what a total nob they are for doing so) and/or a person who puts you down at every opportunity they get.
Being around these people is hard work, and often you will feel incredibly drained/upset/need a butt-tonne of alone time after being around them. These people have a strong ego, and like trying to tame an angry hornet, getting them to see your point of view is often a lost cause.
My first advice is to avoid seeing and interacting with these people if you can. Allowing yourself to be in a situation that will ultimately drain you and damage the good work you have done to practice your self care is just not a good time. If you can’t avoid being around an Energy Vampire say at Christmas or another mandated upcoming event, try your best to simply say your polite hello’s, and then spend your day around other people who are much more enriching and kind.
If you find yourself becoming overwhelmed by the presence of or often very loud voice of the Energy Vampire, find a quiet space to go and take a break. Deep breathe, and know that you have control over your life, actions and well being. And if it all gets to be far too much, make an excuse to leave, head home and get into a nice bath.
Remember that self care is the antidote to feeling escalated, stressed and anxious. Soothing activities will calm that part of yourself that is triggered. You can practice your self care anywhere, and sometimes the best act of self care is to exit a negative situation and protect your energy.
So with this in mind, please remember to make sure that you are scheduling in both fun and soothing self care activities during the festive season, so that you can continue to be your most wonderful self and not be totally drained!
For ideas on how to create a self care routine or some self care tips and tricks, check out my past blog What is Self Care?, and also feel free to download a blank Self care wheel to plan and track your wellness goals!
Big love, and best wishes for Christmas and the New Year!